Thursday, January 24, 2008

Burn baby, burn.

NewFNP's clinic has had a spike in the incidence of STD's lately. Since Cocoa Brown, two more patients have tested positive for syphilis. Neither of them were Ms. Brown's abused partner. Another patient's downstairs was so disturbing in the olfactory sense that newFNP was quite sure that an animal had crawled up there, homesteaded her vagina and died.

And, finally, newFNP has been burned by chlamydia twice recently. Thankfully, the burn has only occurred in her professional life!

Chlamydia is supposed to be asymptomatic at best and have a mild discharge at worst. It is not supposed to mimic gonorrhea and have purulent discharge and a traumatizing odor. NewFNP fully acknowledges that she is at fault here in that she should have treated the patient for chlamydia when she erroneously treated the gonorrhea. But the discharge, people, the discharge. Who could have thought that little ole chlamydia would cause such a thing?!?

It sucks to have failed public health to re-learn the lesson that you treat for chlamydia when you treat for gonorrhea. But here newFNP is, kicking herself for missing the Chlam.

Let this be a lesson to you, newFNP readers. Be liberal with your STD antibiotics.

Judiciously liberal, of course.


npsusan said...

Now you're talking! This is what I deal with day by day in an inner-city high school......and don't forget the trich!

caralee said...

Just found your blog a few months ago, thanks for the good laughs.
I have been hearing more about the Scope of Practice Partnership (SOPP) that the AMA has rolled out. I was wondering if that would affect you and what other NPs think of it.

BostonFNP said...

Can I just say that since the first of the year I have had:
-8 positive pregnancy tests and none of the girls are over the age of 18.
-12 positive chlamydia tests
-3 heroin overdoses at the clinic
-2 MIs.

What the hell in happening in 2008?!?