Friday, May 29, 2009

Dress code violation

The inappropriate t-shirt trend has followed newFNP to the research clinic.  The reach of the inappropriate t-shirt is, apparently, far and wide.


When newFNP saw her patient filling out forms in the waiting room, she did note that his shirt said "F.B.I." across the chest.  NewFNP naively thought that this gentleman seeking to participate in a research study about methamphetamine addiction was perhaps showcasing a touch of irony.

Not so much.  Upon closer inspection, newFNP notes that underneath the "F.B.I.", the shirt read "Female Body Inspector."  Classy.  The only female body part newFNP will let this fellow inspect is her stank eye.

But the self-appointed Female Body Inspector had nothing on the wildly inappropriate t-shirt that another research participant was wearing.  This shirt was a walking advertisement for the metal band Cloven Hoof.  This shirt featured a graphic of a mullet-man orally pleasuring a woman.  Charming.  NewFNP gets it - figuratively - and she is none too pleased.  

When newFNP gets dressed in the morning, she does the usual mirror checks: no VPL, no muffin top, no boob overflow, no totally fucking offensive t-shirt.  Check, check, check and most definitely check.

I mean really.  Cloven Hoof?  Cunnilingus?  What makes someone purchase such a shirt?  And then what possesses someone to wear that shirt to a medical clinic?  

Yuck.


14 comments:

T Rex Mom said...

Those kind of folks lack self-awareness. That's the only reason I can think of.

helen said...

Wow! Fashion is now part of the patient assessment.

New FNP, I know your blog is for you to vent, but maybe you should think about why your patients at the research clinic wear what they do.
They are participating in a methamphetamine addiction research study. Maybe I'm wrong but this implies 1) they need the money and 2) they are/were meth addicts and still need money. Either way, they most likely don't have a lot of money for clothing and can't be that picky about where they shop or what they can choose to buy and wear.

I really hope you show as much compassion to your patients in your interaction with them as you do contempt in your blog.

Anonymous said...

What is VPS?

Anonymous said...

Oops, I mean what is VPL?

newFNP said...

Visible Panty Line.

Anonymous said...

I own that t-shirt ... but I never wear it to a health clinic ... or church, because I have class.

ecrunner said...

Its a shame that we take care to try and represent ourselves in a work area as showing care in our appearance only to be greeted with that. Though, Helen has a point; it is a drug testing... who knows what these people are thinking. But you do a fine job keeping it to yourself and not letting it affect your work.

devi said...

helen....if you read all of or kept up with newfnps blog, you would know that she is one of the most compassionate providers you will ever meet.

and that she oft uses fashion humor to make a statement that she is not all seriousness all the time...

FYI

Anonymous said...

Those shirts are offensive. Just because you're a recovering addict doesn't give you a pass to wear shirts depicting porn. Why excuse this behavior in anyone? If they're so strapped for cash they can't afford anything else, at least show some respect and turn the shirt inside out.

npsusan said...

So... this reminds me of the day that a pregnant teenager walked into the School Based Health Center with a tshirt that said, "Nice girls don't suck, they swallow". I asked "does your mother know that you wore that tshirt to school?".
She answered "This is my mother's tshirt".
Nothing more to say.....

Anonymous said...

Poor judgement is my guess for why your research subjects feel its acceptable to go out in public wearing these tees. The meth addiction was actually my first clue.
And to Helen, I've passed out clothing at charities serving impoverished communities and I don't rembember them handing out offensive and/or inappropriate freebies. I feel safe in assuming that these particular individuals chose those tees and do not wear them because their poverty has forced them to. I respect your opinion, but I assure you that bad taste has nothing to do with income bracket.

Anonymous said...

I went to my annual gyn appt today but couldn't find a skanky enough t-shirt to wear so had to wear half-way decent clothes. Even though I grew up poor, we were brought up to show respect.

Anonymous said...

Let's see, FNP found her patient's t-shirt to be hostile & offensive, Helen found FNP to be hostile & offensive and, in turn, was hostile & offensive. Jeesh. Might want to try reading a bit more of this blog before coming down so hard, Helen.

Actually, I was taught to pay attention to such things with patients (e.g., self-made tatoo spelling LOVE on the knuckles of one hand and HATE on the knuckles of the other). How people present themselves in and to the world can sometimes help inform diagnoses, particularly those that go beyond numbers on tests of physiological functioning. Mental health is a big chunk of overall health.

Anonymous said...

Thank heaven Steve & Barry's went belly up