Sunday, April 10, 2011

POP!!

NewFNP has previously discussed the lady scourge of urinary incontinence. Kegels, ladies, kegels!! But what newFNP hasn't talked about is the sister scourge of pelvic organ prolapse.


NewFNP is super content to leave her lady-junk all up in there, where it's supposed to be. Except the parts that are supposed to be outside. They can stay there. NewFNP is just saying this -- a reasonable expectation for aging is to keep all yo junk in its O.G. spot. Let's get Suzanne Somers to work on this one with her team of experts!

Because when innies become outties, that is not so good.

What makes newFNP think of this on a lovely Sunday is a patient who came in with a chief complaint of feeling something falling out of her vagina. This is the second CC of this nature, but as this patient was in her 50's and was not in the post-partum period, newFNP was certain that she would not find any form of placental treasure upon examination.

What newFNP did see was a fairly obvious cystocele-rectocele combination platter. As newFNP's patient had mentioned that the sensation of fullness was more pronounced when she was using force, newFNP went ahead and had her patient give her a little Valsalva while in the lithotomy position.

Had newFNP been wearing 3D glasses, she might have had a heart attack. "Okay, stop!" she told her patient, fearful that she would deliver her uterus into newFNP's hands.

NewFNP quickly completed the OB/GYN referral and was ready to end the visit when her patient asked her, "Is that happening because I'm not having any sexercise?"

"Did you say 'sexercise'?" newFNP replied.

She had indeed.

Not so much a lack of sexercise, no, but her four >8 pound babies delivered vaginally might perhaps be a more likely culprit. (Or, in other cases, family history. Or obesity. Or hysterectomy.)

5 comments:

The White Family Circus said...

Dear NewFNP:
I am a new FNP, just graduated in December. I am waiting on credentialing through my current job to be completed so I can see patients. Until then I read your blog daily. I've had it on my blogs I follow for a while but with school I didn't get to do much reading. So lately, I have been reading your blogs from when you first started and can I just tell you how much it has eased my mind?!? I'm terrified of seeing my first patient for fear I will in that moment forget everything I have learned! Any advice you have would be wonderful or pointers! And by the way, I LOVE your blog! I love that someone puts how it actually is into words for all of us new FNPs to see! (All of my experience as an RN was in the ER so many of your stories crack me up because I have been there). Thank you for your blog. Thank you for your insight and honesty. But thank you more for making my day each day.

-newbieFNP-
p.s. I'm so glad I found someone else who uses the word "jackhole!" Ha!

Vanessa said...

Hello, can I invite you for an interview to discuss about your job as a Nurse Practitioner? You can email me at vanessa@jobshadow.com if you're interested. Thanks!

Haley Schaeffer said...

I am in school to become a NP and am extremely grateful for your blogs continuous stream of great "real" information for working nurses and aspiring nurses. Keep it up please!

Samuel said...

My name is Samuel, I was in love with my wife and we were married for eight years with a son his is Liam,I loved my wife so much she had access to all my bank account and even my cash app which my accountant agreed to and said it was a great idea, then it took my wife and my accountant two month to get hold of all my properties,all accounts but I had a cash app which they knew nothing about,I was thrown out of my own house was sleeping in a hotel for weeks she also took possession of my son could only see him once a week then I found out she was in love with my accountant all these while so I went online and I came across a private investigator who help me get all my properties and my accounts back even my company back how he did these I don’t know but I gave all the information he asked for and followed all his instructions and now I’m happy my life’s better now.
Thanks to premiumhackservices@gmail.com
I just said I should share my own story here
Thank you

Jason Adams said...

I love this post, thank you for sharing. Also, if you are visit our website if you are looking for assistance with your nursing assignment:

Nursing Assignment Help